I applaud the effort: next time read my profile.

sign

“I don’t know where to start on something like this but I’ll try. But since we are both on this site, I am willing to take a chance to say, “Hello”.

I love your smile and would like the chance to get to know you. I like having easy conversations or debates either over wine or good coffee. I hate to argue! As for me, I’m looking for someone to enjoy the city and share a smile with. Someone to use my “extra” ticket! I like going to NBA basketball games (I have tickets to the Wizards and yes I know they are bad but I like basketball) or events at the Corcoran Gallery, an opera at the Kennedy Center, or trying new restaurants.

I like other things from listening to jazz at Utopia on U Street or taking in a hike on the weekend. And yes, I’m taking Salsa lessons. I would love to try tango too. But don’t tell the guys or else my “Tough Guy Union Card” will be revoked!

If we can start as friends first (I don’t like pressure) that would be cool. So if I can pry you away from the job for little while and put a smile on your face, let’s chat and get to know each other.

E******

In the mean time, this is my attempt to make you smile. Don’t worry I won’t quit my day job.

A Fast Drinker

A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, “What’ll it be buddy?”

The man says, “Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles.”

The bartender does this and watches the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served.

Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he’s doing all this drinking.

“You’d drink them this fast too if you had what I have.”

The bartender hastily asks, “What do you have pal?”

The man quickly replies, “I have a dollar.””

Dear E,

Quick tip – next time read my profile first. I don’t like basketball.

Also, Utopia closed in March. Now yes, it’s a temporary close…but this glaringly obvious mistake tells me that either you don’t get out much (which means we wouldn’t get along) or you simply copied and pasted this email to every girl you’ve found remotely attractive. Either way, not a win.

Also, you’re shorter than me and 13 years older. I go back to the first quick tip – read my profile first.

xoxo,

French My Toast

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