Top 10 Gifts Not to Give This Year!!!


10. Sharktopus. Who wouldn’t want to watch an American Classic dubbed in German with American Subtitles while eating Mc Donald’s pretending you didn’t just hear someone get murdered? (True Story..Stay Tuned)


matching tombstones

9. Matching Tomb Stones.  It may be practical but no one wants to be reminded they are going to die let alone that they will have to lay next to you for all of eternity… Think about it..




8. What the hell?  But seriously Foot House Shoes. Look at these little beauties. Who wouldn’t want these?



7. A positive pregnancy test. We don’t know about you guys but we sure do NOT want this for Christmas!


Britney Spears Divorce Papers

6. Divorce Papers. Its probably not the right time to hand these over in front of the entire family..or is it?

cooking for 1

5. While we appreciate your concern for whether we’re meeting our daily nutritional needs, we don’t think a cook book teaching us the of secrets microwave cooking for one is the way to go.  You should probably just take us to dinner instead.



4. Home Made Boxers. Ok, ladies we get times are tough.  You may have to do things you aren’t proud of to make ends meet but this, this should never be one of them.



3. Cat Shirt. I don’t think I need to say anything else about this…


2. Sausages. Just because someone is single does not mean they have problems finding a good sausage to come home to 😉



1. {Drum Roll please} And last but not least here at FMT, we believe the worst gift you can give someone this holiday season… You guessed it, Herpes. The gift that keeps on giving!

Keep it safe this holiday season everyone!



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